Perspectives
This project is about growing, It's about looking at ourselves through our own perceptions of what others think. These two ladies have joined me on a journey of discovery: we have debated, we have created, we have laughed, cried, and hugged. These photographs are just a part of what has transpired. It all started with the simple question – How do I think other people see me or expect me to be? The discussion is endless from there: Do they see the real me? Who is the real me? I am not who they think I am, or am I?
My hope for this project is to start a dialogue with YOU, the viewer: Are you who you want to be? There are more questions than answers in this project. There is no right or wrong, just your perception of what you are sharing with us.
After the photo sessions with Balpreet and Elena I asked them to tell me in their own words what this project meant to them.
Balpreet Nijjar
“Oh you look very cute, you look like a teenager”, I am tired of listening these words every day. I grew up in India when I was a teenager, but I was always given lessons how to behave like a sophisticated women. I wanted to go out play with kids and be a kid, but that didn't happen much. I moved to Canada when I was 16-17, a huge turn in my life. It confused me, couldn't figure out if “she” should follow her traditional and cultural rules, or just live like an open minded Canadian women. At home, my ears would start bleeding listening to traditional and cultural lullabies. I got married and the age of 21, it was an arranged marriage because parents are always right and they have more experience than we do. After getting married, I murdered my own feelings and played a role of a puppet whose strings were in MR Husband's hands or his families hands. Oh man! This cultural crap and family drama was suffocating me day by day. One day, I freed myself and flew far away in the sky like a little bird and was overwhelmed by the breathing in open and fresh air. I might look like a kid, but I am woman who stood strong and tried to overcome all the difficulties she has in her life. So you people tell me, “Is it okay to judge the book by it’s cover.” This story is not fiction, it's a real story and there is more to it, its my story, and it's not offending anybody either
Thank u
Elena T
This project is about perspectives. My perspective on others' perspective on me. I think that the real, much like the ideal, is a matter of perspective. The parameters of the ideal vary across culture, society, community, school of thought: Refined, sophisticated, unobtrusive, gentle courteous...
Sassy, sexy, bold, unabashed, fun...
I don't know which one is more the real me or if any of it is real enough. I don't know if other people really see me in either of those ways, or if my perspective of their perspective is off.
The moral I take from this project is that second-guessing what people expect from me or see in me is worse than a wast of time. Identifying and living up to expectations can create anxieties, insecurities and feelings of inadequacy. How about embracing the boundless freedom of self-transformation and self-exploration as the ideal?
The world is as judgemental as I make it to be.
